Hot Things to be Enraged About
If you are on twitter, read any blogs, or are a member of most message boards (not our cool one) then you are likely seeing people all up in arms and enraged about the following topics. Most are based in myth, but at very least based on half truth and should not be expressed with such absolute.
Are you enraged about these things? Might be time to think again.
Get rage on…Bread
Whatever you do in life know that if you eat bread you are the lowest of the low. You are such a piece of crap that your mother should have tied you to a pole at a truck stop and drove away. Bread will not only rob you of your abs, gains, and fat loss, but your health too. That is, if that wasn’t all complete crap and not true.
Get rage on…Isolation exercises
Be it helping to support your look or improve your bench, isolation exercises have their place. To say otherwise just means you are only concerned with full body compound lifts that get you super huge and strong like the crossfit guys.
Get rage on…Crossfit
What? It was fitting to the previous post.
Get rage on…White Rice
You better not even think about eating rice that isn’t brown. Don’t you know what brown rice has the same or less nutrients, can be harder to digest, and has roughly the same GI index especially if mixed with other foods. Loser.
Get rage on…Walking
Nothing good ever, EVER will come from walking. Forget the fact that in dozens of studies it has proven to be superior to medications, training, and dieting for issues like fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, anxiety, and weight loss. Walking is what weak people do who want to eat into muscle.
Get rage on…Water bottles
Seriously? A few hours of research shows that this is complete bull. Don’t worry, a great article will be coming up soon to let you know that it is in fact safe to drink a bottle of water. In the meantime you can check out episode 128.
Get rage on…Guru haters
Look, it is one thing if they are being a troll and hypocritical, (wait that IS most of them) but sometimes you are just wrong and don’t have a come back. Understand that if used properly a guru hater can make you fantastic at your job. Otherwise get used to a life of fails.
Get rage on…Gurus
Oh poor me, that evil guru makes so much money, wah wah. The money on the net isn’t half of what you think it is. If you can teach yourself how to build a home robot girlfriend, but you can’t learn how to make a real friend or market your blog, that isn’t their problem. Become competition or stop whining you pansy.
Get rage on…Long rest times
I got an idea, how about we just NEVER stop working out? What if we just trained for day after day after day only stopping when we physically are forced to the ground from our dehydrated and cortisol overfilled bodies? That would be awesome!
Get rage on…Eating dairy
Those fucking cows.
Get rage on…Eating meat
Those poor cows.
Get rage on…Eating late at night
Don’t you know what once the sun goes down if you take run bite you are turning into a Gremlin? Remember Gizmo was the one who dressed up like Rambo, he could control his late night urges. So you decide, are you a good guy Rambo or an evil mohawk sporting gremlin?
Editors Note: Even before hitting the publish button I could feel the hate mail being written and the unsubcribe button being clicked. AWESOME!
Comments are closed.