No Bull: Mary Jane Beats Steroids, Again
OMG! Steroids!: This investigative report from Kansas City’s NBC affiliate is groundbreaking. Of over 36,000 high school students surveyed in Kansas, guess how many are taking steroids. I’ll wait. What’s that? 2,000? No, go lower. 1,000? Nope. 322. Yes, 322. Or roughly 0.8 percent of students. And in Johnson County, a suburban county in Kansas, an average of FOUR(!!!!!!!!!) students are juicing. (and, as the reporter said, they threw in fake questions so they KNOW that number is accurate). Well shiver me timbers and tie me up, this needs to be stopped! Ban steroids! If this steroid story took up three minutes of the news, imagine the hour long special report on marijuana use in high schools.
OMG! New fitness words!: Calorie burnability. (Yes, it’s from the same affiliate, and yes, there truly was a story telling you that one exercise burns 10 calories more per half hour than another one does. And yes, that trainer sure looked like he was clueless and/or bullshitting)
Ridiculous airbrushing of the week: When you’re going to airbrush someone, you might want to do it before you post the pictures online for the interwebz to catch.
Ridiculous ridiculousness of the week: So when you’re dumb enough to take back the dude who beat the crap out of you, what do you do for protection? If you’re Rihanna, you get guns. Or more specifically, tattoos of guns. Seriously, she needs help.
Ridiculous excuse of the week: So now I can blame my every-other-minute usage of the word “fuck” on the economy? Those are some fucking brilliant mother fuckers who thought of this fucking idea. But wait! There’s this: “If you can’t get through one paragraph without swearing, then you need to get a dictionary and starting expanding your vocabulary. It might also be a red flag that you have some anger issues that you need to get a grip on.” Well fuck me.
Ridiculously good looking ballpark food of the week: The four pound burger. When I first saw the $20 price tag, I thought that it was really expensive. But if a double cheeseburger (roughly a ¼ pounder) at McDonald’s is $1, it’s really not that much of a ripoff in relation to ballpark food. And I’m going to wager that the first person to eat it all is skinny. For some reason, fat people can’t eat under pressure and on a time limit. Have you ever seen a (good) fat competitive eater?
Shane video of the week: Shane takes on Timbaland.
Random non fitness thought of the week: Steak and Shake has half-price shakes from 2-4 PM. You can thank me later.
Nick Bromberg has written for the Kansas City Star, The Big Lead, The Sports Frog and other websites and publications. Nick graduated from the University of Missouri Journalism school in May of 2008 with a degree in News Editorial. Nick is currently studying for his C.S.C.S and has attended the JPFitness Summit for the past four years, an event he loves so much that he’s hosting the 2009 edition in Kansas City, MO. You can find Nick hanging out online at the FLzine forums, The Sports Frog and the JPFitness Forums.
Comments are closed.